So today was peak +7 and I was determined to have my blood drawn on the correct day this month since last cycle it was anyone's guess what day I had it drawn. Even still, I pushed it right to the last minute and at 11:35 (the clinic closed at noon) we were pulled over on the side of the road, looking up the location on Ryan's iPhone.
We finally found it, but as we pulled up I panicked. I had forgotten the slip from my doctor. It as a twenty minute or more drive home so there was no way we would make it, but I knew I had to try. Ryan dropped me off and immediately headed back home while I ran around this oddly-layed-out medical building complex looking for what ended up being an unmarked door to the lab.
I signed in and tried to stay calm. I prayed the rosary, asking Our Lady to help us out - get Ryan home and back safely and quickly, make those ahead of me move very slowly, and make the woman working the lab have a kind heart and be sympathetic to my situation.
Not surprisingly, my prayers were answered. With a few people ahead of me in line, my name didn't get called until shortly after twelve and by that time Ryan was on his way back, about ten minutes away. I begged the woman to wait and she agreed. She locked the door and started in on whatever she had to do before she left for the day, while I watched the parking lot through a waiting room window. He finally arrived and she drew my blood. God bless her. I hope I didn't interfere too much with her day. I know staying later than she had planned on a Saturday is probably not what she had in mind.
I say 'not surprisingly' my prayers were answered because I know how powerful the intercession of Our Lady is, but I should also point out that a lot had to go right for my blood to get drawn. It takes at least twenty minutes to get home and twenty minutes to get back. At least. Ryan did it in thirty. And the woman was so sweet, despite the fact that she probably wanted nothing more than to get home to her family on a Saturday afternoon. I have no doubt my prayers were heard. I'm not saying that this was the biggest deal ever, or that the world would have stopped if I had to wait until Monday, but it just goes to show that prayer can be a powerful tool in all situations.
And you know what? It might have been God's will for me to not get my blood drawn; we all know that we don't always hear a "yes" to our prayer requests. But when I put it in our Lady's hands, I felt calm and knew it would all work out, no matter what happened.
So now I wait. Hopefully I'll have the results by mid week.
I'm actually considering asking for an appointment with my doctor. I know for some of you that is a normal request, but for some reason I am nervous about it. He said we'd talk again after the four cycles of Tamoxifen are complete (I'm on number two right now), but even that is up in the air. I kind of got the impression that he thought my next call would be telling him I was pregnant, which is good, but I'm thinking I need a plan B.
I know some of you may have read on Sew's blog that her doctor is testing her for a clotting disorder that he suspects of causing very early miscarriage in some women. Well, I've never written about this before, but I have had some very odd circumstances that have had me thinking for more than a month now that I should get tested for this. It's not that I have a medical reason to think I have it; it's more that I keep getting outward signs (Sew's appointment being one of the most recent) that this may be an issue for me; like perhaps the Holy Spirit is pushing me to get the test. I am still not sure about this, and tend to think that perhaps this message is actually meant for someone else I know.
Sorry if that seems cryptic. My dilemma is that I need to decide if I should bring this up to my doctor. Well, I have already decided to bring it up to him eventually, but I am starting to think I should call and set up an appointment to talk about it sooner rather than later. But what do I say? On what grounds do I ask for an appointment (I figure the blood clotting thing would probably be too confusing to explain to a nurse over the phone)? Can I just tell the nurse I have done two rounds of Tamoxifen and I want to sit down with him to talk about it?
I'm probably overreacting. Part of me thinks it would be impatient of me and I should just wait until I'm done with the Tamoxifen.
I'd love to hear what you think.
Saturday, February 21, 2009
Close call
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Ultimately the outcome to our situation is in God's hands. You can actually see where I take control of my situation, let into the bombardment of the devil, and make my own infertility treatment plan. What you can also see is God deliver me from my bad decisions. :) Everything must be tested, each path, until you know the right one to go down.
ReplyDeleteI think in my very little view of my situation I am not seeing the whole picture. Neither do I trust completely the path I am supposed to take. So I try walking down many roads. But the journey begins with one step. And I believe that I must keep on moving because time is a ticking.
What I am trying to say is that we must agressively help ourselves in this process. My doctor and I talked about being as agressive as possible, but we both agree that is a good talk and ultimately we are not in control. We are not acting like it either. We just want to be very proactive in this process. I like to think "determined" as well.
I don't want to sit around and wait. 95% of my problem is out of the way! We have 5% left to work out. That is my opinion. The outcome is in Gods hands and I am surrendered to that fact.
There is nothing wrong with getting a prescription for the blood test. You can do it on any day of the cycle since it's a DNA test. That is all it is. You don't even need to make an appointment with your doctor. Since you have met your doctor I am sure he will write you a prescription over the phone. I can even get you more information about the test that was run on me.
It's 9 viles of blood. That's it! :) What can it hurt! Nada!
AYWH--This is God--Get the test! ;)
ReplyDeleteI'd get the test, too, if I were you.
ReplyDeleteIn fact, I am me, and I think I'll ask to get the test. But I don't know what to ask for? :/
I haven't read through the comments yet, but here's my gut reaction:
ReplyDeleteGET the test! This is WAY too weird, but I have been getting the SAME SIGNS as you, telling me to get these tests done. Mine have been rather blatant, though, and for some reason I've ignored them until Sew's phone call yesterday. (I got an email from a woman on a C.atholic Y.ahoo group telling me specifically that she thought I should be tested, and that her first month of treatment for clotting disorders she conceived! And for 10 yrs she thought she had never conceived, when in reality she may have been all along, just not implanting very well.)
Anyway... my point is that after talking to Sew, I realized I have to do this. My Dr kind of brushed it off when I first told her, but I do think there's something to this.
I'm really glad to hear the lab P+7 worked out today, too :) Such a relief when things go right, even the little things, isn't it?
If I were you, I would ask your dr. about it. I think that everything that can be, should be looked into. If we don't conceive in the next 3-4 months, I am going to ask, too!
ReplyDeleteLOVE your story about getting your blood drawn! The gift of prayer is so amazing, isn't it? Especially when we have a devotion to Our Lady - I love it! What I love most about reading Our Lady of Kibeho is how intimate and personal the visionaries are with her. If we truly believe she is our mother, then we would pray to her in that intimate way too.
ReplyDeleteAnd about your doctor, YES I would totally make an appointment with him! To be honest, he might not even realize that it's only been 2 cycles versus 4 cycles. (Is that bad to say???) ;) I can't imagine they would deny you an appointment. I think you have plenty to discuss, and Dr. B is always open to new ideas. Don't you agree? He's all about having the patient participate in their treatment. Which I sometimes was frustrated with, but works in your favor right now!
And selfishly, I think you should have your appointment soon so that we can meet up for dinner afterwards!!
Any response? You have to tell me before lent comes!!!!! ;)
ReplyDeleteI think you should ask for an appointment and get the test.
ReplyDeleteI wanted to encourage you, also, not to feel bad about asking for follow-ups. The reason is because - as well all know- infertility is NOT a one-time fix.
Drs. who treat it, in my humble view, have to be willing to follow patients often and for long periods of time to help them resolve all their obstacles to conceiving.
Ask yourself why you are afraid to make that appointment. If you think your Dr. is annoyed or frustrated, then I think that is not right b/c this is the nature of infertility! Try a couple cycles of this, see your Dr. and re-evaluate.
Try a few more cycles of that, see your Dr. and re-evaluate.
Plus, you'll have the results of your bloodwork by then, so you'll need to discuss that as well.
It isn't as though you are going in every week, it's been two cycles already, right??
Drs. who treat infertility have to realize that their patients need their help on an ongoing basis.
AHHH!!! Sorry for this rant.
Make that appointment and don't for one second feel badly about it or embarrassed asking for it. You have a good Dr.
Granted, he's busy. But you are just as important as any one of his other patients, and you really need his help.