The God of peace

Well it's officially cycle day one.

As for details, the cycle lasted 24 days and went eleven days post peak. That's a pattern lately, I seem to have had an eleven day luteal phase for a few cycles in a row. So now I'm left wondering what was with all this strange spotting this cycle; overall there was less of it, but this time it was on strange days.

The good news is tomorrow is my doctor's appointment. I think later today I'll post all my questions I'm coming up with for him, and then I'll print them out so I can take them with me.

So, the second reading at Mass this weekend really struck me. I think us infertile women - at least the ones struggling, and isn't that all of us? - can take something from it.

Phil 4:6-9
Brothers and sisters: Have no anxiety at all, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God. Then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is gracious, if there is any excellence and if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. Keep on doing what you have learned and received and heard and seen in me. Then the God of peace will be with you.

I like practical advice. Paul here tells us everything to do:
1) Do not have anxiety.
2) Approach the Lord with thanksgiving, thanking him for all he has blessed us with.
3) Ask the Lord for what you want.
4) He may not give you what you want, but have peace knowing you've prayed about it. We can relax and know it is in his hands.
5) I the meantime, think positively. Focus on the good things God has created and given you.
6) Keep plugging along. Do what you know you should be doing as a Christian, and you will have peace.

I will try to do this, but it's hard. Number one means I can't worry about the possibility of never getting pregnant, how depressed I will be with my life, whether I am doing the right thing, etc., etc. That's not easy. I don't do enough of number two. I try to thank God but it's probably forced; I hurry through it to get to my requests, because that's what I'm there for. I know number four is true, and recently a friend really showed me this by example. It's still difficult to reach that level of understanding, but I'm going to try. I don't do nearly enough of number five, and I bet anything that it works. Maybe I'll really try this one.

Let's face it, when I take God's advice it always works. So why am I hesitant every time? Trust, I guess, and this stupid humanness that gets in the way.

Well I've gotta go get ready for a walk. I'm trying to lose a couple more pounds before my doctor's appointment tomorrow and my official weigh-in. It's definitely not going to help that I'll probably be bloated now!