He makes all things new

I just wanted to share with you a song I love, that makes me tear up. It's really beautiful, and although it's not intended to, it can totally relate to infertility (I know, shocking that something reminded me of infertility). 

Specifically, the line "you make all things new" really speaks to me about God's healing power. Those of us struggling with this all want to be made new right now - whether that means our bodies, our hearts, or our whole lives. This song reminds me that we will be made new - our lives will change and the suffering will be replaced with joy. That's what God does, and what he wants to do for us.

Here's the passage from Revelations:

“Then I saw a new heaven and a new earth. The former heaven and the former earth had passed away, and the sea was no more. I also saw the holy city, a new Jerusalem, coming down out of heaven from God, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. I heard a loud voice from the throne saying, "Behold, God's dwelling is with the human race. He will dwell with them and they will be his people and God himself will always be with them (as their God). He will wipe every tear from their eyes, and there shall be no more death or mourning, wailing or pain, (for) the old order has passed away." The one who sat on the throne said, "Behold, I make all things new." Then he said, "Write these words down, for they are trustworthy and true.” He said to me, "They are accomplished. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the beginning and the end. To the thirsty I will give a gift from the spring of life-giving water.” (Revelation 21:1-5)

God will always be with us. He will wipe every tear from our eyes. He makes all things new.

Come to Jesus

Well we had a busy weekend. We had friends and family in town for the nas.car race today. It was actually supposed to be last night, until the big bad tropical storm threatened to destroy the state of Virginia as we know it and forced the postponement of the race til today. Last night turned out to be a gorgeous night. So, instead of watching the race on a beautiful September evening, I got sun-burned this afternoon. Oh well. It was my first nas.car experience and it was fun. Loud, but fun. And hot.

I've been doing better lately, but that's probably because everyone has been here the past few days. I wasn't doing so hot before they arrived. I've been feeling sad, I assume, due to the four-year anniversary and because I've been having moments where all of a sudden I realize I may never have biological children. Don't you hate that? It's not the first time it has happened. The thoughts just sneak up on you - I could be watching t.v. or lying in bed - and all of a sudden - BAM! - it becomes crystal clear that I may never see our own genetic child. It's like all along it had been possible that this was just a dream and in that moment I realize it is definitely not. Weird.

I don't mean to be a downer. And I also want to add that despite my saddness, I still trust God. His plan is best for me, even if it hurts. In my bad times I am trying to remind myself of what was said in my mother's dream. When my mother was surprised to see me holding a baby, my grandmother told her "don't worry." We are currently saying our second novena to the Infant of Prague, and I wholly trust that He will take care of me.

Before I go, I wanted to share something that I came upon just now. Maybe it will help someone else who is struggling tonight. I absolutely love this song and it makes me cry every time.