Clara's shower

At many points throughout the last five-and-a-half years, I truly thought I'd never be attending my own baby shower. But I did on Saturday.

It was surreal, and kind of funny when, as I was getting ready minutes before it began, I thought to myself, "Probably not too many women can say they were on cycle day three at their own baby shower!" I'm eternally thankful that I can now joke about that sort of thing!

The shower was amazing. Clara was the guest of honor, for sure. She wore a cute party dress, and I don't think I saw her again after guests started arriving!

My mom threw the party at her house and somehow forty people fit comfortably. The food was awesome. It was a brunch and we had tons of good stuff, including baked french toast, my mom's potato salad (my favorite!) and delicious cupcakes.

I used to think about how it wouldn't work out to have a shower if we adopted, and that it'd be just another thing I'd be missing out on, so I think it was really important for me to have one. I can understand holding off if you're worried about the adoption being finalized, but in our case we have been completely open with the world from the very start, so having a shower didn't change anything (plus, ours won't be finalized until this time next year, God willing). It was just a really great way for everyone to meet little Clara, and after hearing our story, so many people couldn't wait to see her. And how much more fun is a shower when the baby is in attendance?

I don't have many pictures of the actual shower just yet (I didn't really have a chance to use my camera in between eating and opening presents), but I do have some shots from the weekend:

My mom, me and Clara at the shower

Clara LOVES her grandfather. She smiles every time he talks to her!

She got to meet her great-grandpa

Her smile just makes me melt! It really wipes away all the pain of the last five-and-a-half years, in a split second. Not that the heartache hadn't already been erased, but the beauty of this is that the suffering is continually wiped away, day after day. God's redeeming power is mind blowing.

Not that it's a choice we'd ever get to make, but I'd suffer every second again just to get Clara. While in the throes of infertility, I used to think about that at times, that the pain was necessary because I would, eventually, be given a child that I wouldn't have met if not for infertility. It was so abstract back then, but I did try to cling to it, and it's even more real now than I ever could have imagined at the time. Clara was always meant to be ours, and the last five years was our unique journey, designed by our Lord, to bring us together with her. We wouldn't have it any other way.